14
May/09
7

new millennium studies project: manifesting vision

we had to do our unit 4 project on our future.
the song is: A Deafening Distance by God is an Astronaut

I just said my artist statement for the narration. This is what it says:

As seconds turn to minutes, minutes into hours, and hours into days, I am stepping closer to the end of the line, already kicking myself for wasting my time and my youth. I am 19, about to finish my first year of college, and entirely terrified and fascinated with how quickly the time has passed.
I have backup plans for my backup plans for my backup plans, my ideal life all laid out crisp and clean in my mind with most possibilities already mapped out. My entire life has been spent focusing on the future, planning for high school to prepare myself for college to get myself a job so that I can settle down with a life that I may or may not want 20 years from now. With my life set on fast forward I dont realize how many opportunities for wonderful memories have been screaming in my face for some attention until they have passed me by and we have gone our separate ways.
My last year to be a screw up teenager is going to slip through my fingers even more quickly the past 19, and I am just now taking off the blinders and realizing that being 19 going on middle age crisis is not the way I want to live.
I want to leave my anxiety behind and live in the moment. I want to create. I want to appreciate everything around me. I want to be reckless. I want to travel. I want to love. I want to stay up all night and all day. I want to dumpster dive and couch surf. I want to PROVILLUS out my hair just to cut it all off in a fit of rage. I want to make photographs for myself and not for a grade. I want to learn three more languages. I want to read more books than I can count. I want to watch enough films to fill a video store. I want to make rotten horror films with my friends. I want to inspire someone else. I want to learn to make music. I want to lose my inhibitions. I want to bike across state. I want to move to another country. I want to forgive. I want to breathe. I want to volunteer. I want to make a difference. I want to relax. I want to remember everything and not look back on the things I did not do while I was young enough to get away with it.
Time is immortal, but people are not, and it is too fragile to waste on worry and living up to standards someone else has set for us and our society. For my future, yes I have my plan for school, a job, and to settle down and have a family. More importantly, though, I am going to take advantage of my youth while it is still available to me. Im going to take a deep breath, calm down, and take things one step at a time. My father is right when he tells me Im only young once, so for once, Im going to listen.
Forgot the past, lost the future, only now remains.

Duration : 0:3:42


Technorati Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Comments (7) Trackbacks (0)
  1. zombiesomnambulism
    8:20 am on May 14th, 2009

    yes!
    yes!

  2. AllyArsonist
    8:20 am on May 14th, 2009

    That was beautiful.
    That was beautiful.

  3. AsheInWonderland
    8:20 am on May 14th, 2009

    Absolutely amazing.
    Absolutely amazing.

  4. FuckOffBree
    8:20 am on May 14th, 2009

    I like it. :]
    I like it. :]

  5. LadyGeniveve
    8:20 am on May 14th, 2009

    :O was that stuffed …
    :O was that stuffed animal a moogle!!!??

  6. AndrewBravener
    8:20 am on May 14th, 2009

    five-hundred …
    five-hundred twenty-five thousand six-hundred minutes,

    Your intro cued Rent in my head. Probably the opposite of what you planned.

    I liked this. :]

  7. Jannabelle126
    8:20 am on May 14th, 2009

    this is …
    this is fanfreakingtastic!

Leave a comment

No trackbacks yet.